Prodigal Daughter

20 09 2009

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There’s nothing quite like listening to good music while driving to somewhere you don’t really wanna go to. It helps you to endure the duration of the trip, and then leaves you with a tune you can hum in your head.. a little buffer of rhythmic sub-consciousness beneath the grinding of the day.. especially if you find it difficult to be present, living in the now, like me.

So it’s REALLY cool when the songs themselves help you to remember the present (the now)- and the present (the gift)of everything. The love, the intelligence that is beyond textbooks and seminars, holy books and preachers, creeds and deeds.. Rachael Brady is one beautiful human being who writes such songs. I thank her. I thank the Creator for creating through her. For like her, we all have gone our own way, forgetting that we are children of the One. Prodigal children unite and forgive, untie the self-inflicted strings around our feet and believe.

As my good friend Aaron Nebaeur always says: It’ All A Miracle. Recieve it.

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reading between the life lines

9 01 2009
the big issue summer edition

the big issue summer edition

 I bought a magazine today. It has been a while since I bought one. It was $5 and within the first minute of reading I felt blessed. I read about a man who has had a really rough life with sexual abuse, psychological damage from fighting in Vietnam, alcohol addiction and family traumas. This magazine is helping to put the pieces of his life back together. The editor asks readers to spread the word because in these times of economical difficulties their vendors are struggling. So here’s a link to THE BIG ISSUE Australia. And here’s one for those unlucky enough to not live in Australia - The Big Issue International. The season for giving and living is NOT over.

As an aside, I got off the train after closing the magazine this morning. When I saw a man who always gives out free magazines (Mormon or JW’s, I can’t remember) who just stands there displaying 4 magazines and looking grumpy, I had an idea. I said ‘I’ll swap you’. He was confused. He thought it was a crossword book. I said ‘It’s The Big Issue. I’ll swap you’. He politely refused and I walked off smiling.

I’ve read that Jesus said your Kingdom come, your will be done ON EARTH, as it is in heaven. So I remind myself that my reflection and action of God’s love starts here, today.





5 11 2008

27/10/08

I had an amazing morning today. After a bit of a drama I got dropped off at the bus stop nearby and sent in one of those white vans that are the new buses.. new, comfortable, expensive and fast compared to the big bulky buses. No complaints here. I got to ‘Future Park’ and walked over to the ‘Beer Factory’ restaurant thing and was met by a well-dressed man.. At this point I’m thinking that my relaxed attire (ie retro pal blue polo, brown flare and sandals) may not be so appropriate.. for this visit to a Thai prison.

Yes I was on my way to a prison. It was a kind of a prisoners’ village where they raise chicken, grow vegetables, make umbrellas and walk around with t-shirt, shorts and sandals.. sometimes with no shirt on, coz it’s pretty hot. It’s located about 1 hour out of Bangkok.. but there are 5-6 in Bangkok itself I was told.

I met this pastor guy yesterday at Church of Joy on Sukhumvit 14. He doesn’t work there usually, but was just there speaking that week. He mentioned this prison visit thing that he does, and that he had started a church – whose congregation was made up of 50% ex-prisoners. So there I was this morning in one of those places he goes to regularly to minister to people.

Anyway this guy who met me was another pastor. He used to be a janitor at a church, where he stuck around and 14 years later became an elder there.. what a cool story. He thought I was the best thing since sliced rice bread.

So we went in. Surely enough there was a quick talk about my sandals.. I mean it IS an official government place after all. He managed to get me in (just this once, he said) to the prison with another helper dude who brought a guitar with him and met us there. It was hot. We went through 4 gates after leaving anything of value, especially cash, in the lockers. It was a big place and no way as depressing as Bogga Rd Gaol in Brisbane. I mean there was plenty of trees and bushes nicely trimmed in the well kept gardens along the pathways. It really felt like a mini town, which is clean and tidy, and would have been a nice place to hang out, except that it’s a prison and you don’t get to do whatever you want or eat whatever you want. In fact there are serious rules you had to follow like Dont Do Drugs, Dont Have Sexual Relations, You’re Not Allowed To Possess Anything Valuable, Dont Steal, Dont Use Force..etc. And apparently the food is horrid, and is rarely enough, let alone tasty.

So we got there, and we were greeted by an enthusiastic ‘Sawasdee Krub’ from the crowd of about 40 men sitting nicely on benches in the cool shed of the meeting place building hut thing, surrounded by about another 40 guys working on their umbrellas. Someone was playing Amazing Grace on the Keyboard and there were immediately 3 glasses of cold water placed on stage for us. We started singing some songs – and to my surprise these guys had good voices. Harmonies were sung on some songs and as I found out later on they actually sing in a choir of about 400 people! I told them they sounded better than the professional singers i heard the night before at P’ Pu Unchalee’s THIS IS LOVE worship concert at Siam Paragon – coz that’s what i really thought!

Then our pastor dude got up to share from the bible.. and his experience. Some of what he said made me uncomfortable, but the main massage was that we ought to have faith. In a world where things are all a bit crazy – we have to have faith. The birds in the air don’t grow rice, but they still have plenty to eat… the worm in the ground.. God looks after his creation, so have faith that God will look after you. In the context of where we were I could see that it was hard to believe that there could be hope. To have faith i think you have to have hope. I wasn’t sure what people were thinking as they listened.

Anyway my turn came to share. I had this passage from Matthew 5 or 6 about loving your enemy, but I started singing Amazing Grace because I think the pastor ended his sermon with a prayer. Having been built up by the pastor to be a bit of a rockstar from Australia.. I felt a bit strange.. and was pretty nervous especially since I haven’t done any public speaking in Thai for years.. But words kind of just came to me. Sentence after sentence. I felt like I was speaking in Brisbane in between songs. I even managed to throw in some smart remarks and funny comments that made some of the guys smile and some even laughed. (The part about my brother and I driving down the freeway chasing some girls in another was a favourite.. the ed of that story was us hitting the side of the road and writing the car off.. and realising God’s grace that we didn’t get injured and that our Dad was concerned about one thing: that we were safe. Not the car. Not the cost. Not even our dodgy driving. I think he could tell in our eyes that we were pretty sorry)

I told them how my dad came to know Christ from a Bhuddist up-bringing in Thailand. I told them about my week in Pattaya at the Micah Network Conference.. about my new friends who are living with HIV and some who used to be injecting drug users. I told them about what I thought of God. I told them about the Jesus that I follow. I told them that I have experienced God’s love in my life and blessing in my life, and that we are loved and blessed by God to be a blessing to other people. I told them that Jesus wants us to love. To love our friends and families. To love all people. But most of all I told them that we ought to love our enemies.. that’s what Jesus said. I said that it is the only thing that has the potential to change our country and our world. That the circle of violence and destruction and selfishness can be stopped. Loving your enemy is easy to say, but extremely hard. I told them that we are called to a happy, content and blessed life, but that it is also a difficult life when you want to follow Christ.

I learned a new song form a lady called Musa from South Africa last week, so i thought it to the group. They dug it, and will try to sing it again after I’m gone. Then I spoke some more about having faith… and somehow I managed to finish my time by singing John Lennon’s Imagine in a Thai Prison. I didn’t the finked-up version though.. just straight.. so they could all sing a long to the ‘Yoo Hoo.. Hoo-oo-oo’ in just before the chorus. It was beautiful. I translated the chorus for them.. and I could see that they got it. They were with me and we were all with Christ, at least for that one moment. They understood that we were all have done wrong things in our lives. They knew that we can all change. And they knew that Christ’s way is the way toward that change.

They were all believers – they’ve even been baptised. And they love singing praises to God, both in Thai and English. And most of them are recovering drug-addicts who have been in jail for years and probably will be in there for a long time. One of them was getting out this week, but many will be there still. I got to shake the keyboardist’s hand and another dude who paid extra attention to my ramblings and laughed at the appropriate moments. He told me quickly about their next gig which is the opening of the church. He was pretty excited because the King’s daughter is going to be there to open the church. Very cool. (You have to be a Thai to understand this!)

I was told to say a closing prayer.. I prayed that they will become strong people who are kind and loving and that they will have faith that God is with them anywhere they go,.. and that God loves them more than anything in this world. I wish I could have shaken all of their hands and hugged some of them.. but like many times in Bangkok I feel that my Thai culture was holding me back.. like if I showed too much affection to people they will be freaked out. (Especially with children.. my beard apparently makes me look like a scary giant.)

The pastor said he hoped I could come again. I thought ‘Ofcourse I will’ and I’ll bring someone else with me.

Then I went to our favourite Thai Massage place to get a foot massage and convince them to teach me.. They did! So I’m going back tomorrow and the next day to practice foot massage!

Then dad and I went to buffet dinner with our cousin and his wife and son. It’s the first time I’ve met my nephew. He is talkative and shy. And he reminds me a lot of my cousin when he was young, except not as fat or spoiled :) His wife was lovely and smart, and spoke well to her son. It was cool to think back to our time in Brisbane together and all our friends most of whom are married with children. I love my cousin’s easy-going attitude and his accommodating presence. I don’t think I’ve ever appreciated his company so much before. Might be because I haven’t really talked to any thai peers properly lately. We ate lots and I’m hoping to go and see some jazz tomorrow night with my cousin and a few old friends.

I’m totally buggered but it’s been a good day. Felt like time stood still and I things just kind of happened.





Airport Blues

20 10 2008

I am sitting on an unfinished internet kiosk at the being-improved Brisbane International, facing the runway looking at the reflection of travelers taking photos of each other in the airport lounge. It was a toss-up between browsing isles of enticing expensive perfumes and alcohol or coming to the gate early and reading a book… or blogging, of course! Rachel dropped me off to the airport, which means we were here way early and were able to have a nice coffee and goodbye chat after I checked in. It would have been a lot harder, this goodbye thing, except that we spent a bit of time together today, which was really nice, but we’ve probably seen eachother enough today!.. Note to self: always try and get the day off work when you’re traveling overseas alone.

Today was cool. I spent the morning interviewing my sister-in-law, who is a social worker who is currently working at a domestic-abuse helpline. She was awesome. Honest and thoughtful and very well spoken. And she’s Thai as well, which is kind of nice. I’m hoping to use cut and paste the interview into a video reflection about domestic violence, suggested by Greg Manning.. who’s organising this MIcah Network Conference in Thailand I’m going to help out at. We’re thinking of using a song called STAY by U2. (Actually, my brother and I performed this song with a female drummer at our school talent quest at High School. I think we were called Ice Coffee. (Hey, it was either that or US3, alright?!? :) )  Hopefully I can post some of it online when we put it together sometime next week in Pattaya. We’re hoping to be able to help people reflect on the domestic violence amongst unmarginalised church goers, and how to stop it.

Then we went to have lunch with our mums.. food is such a great thing. Just eat. Say a few things, but if you can’t think of anything just comment on the food.. And then just work out a way to politely refuse the leftovers.. ‘I’m going overseas’ is a pretty good excuse.

After packing and getting ready, we went to the Gabba Theology Group thing at Ben and Sarah’s.. Dave Andrews was sharing on The Cross as Catalyst. Awesome. I love this group of people. We’re from different backgrounds and current settings: Brethren, Lutherans, Pentecostal, Anglican, Catholic, and non-churched.. and we’re all thirsting for a way to follow Jesus that is liberated and liberating. God-centred and other-focused. it’s a great headspace to be in when you’re about to head off somewhere to be a blessing to other people. I’m forgiven so that I may forgive. Loved by God so that I may love others. Saved in order to share salvation with others. Redeemed to bring about redemption in the world. Befriended by god to become a friend of the friendless. I really felt a sense of family. Like I was at a big family gathering just before I leave to go to Uni in a different town. It was like an unspoken commissioning. The friends who have shaped my thinking for the past year have sent me (financially and spiritually) on this trip. It makes me take it a bit more seriously. Like what I do actually matters! This Jesus dude is turning out to be quite a character.. not just a character u analyse or subject you study at Bible College or one dimensional superhero from kiddies sunday school..  More interesting meanings continue to emerge from his life story.. and as my life journey unfold, his life, teachings, death and resurrection become more mysterious, meaningful, beautiful and engaging at the same time.

If this plane crashes and I don’t get to blog again then at least I know these things for sure: My parents love me. My partner adores me. My brother and his wife love me (and their daughter, my niece, actually smiled and laughed with me today! :) My friends believe in me and await my return. And God loves me, and wants me to be the best me that I can be to share his love with others.

If the plane doesn’t crash then I hope to blog about some people I share God’s love with.








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